Private and the Golden Dubloon
by Kat Lee formerly Pirate Turner
Summary: Trouble ensues when Private finds a dubloon.  Mild Slash.
1. Chapter 1

Title: "Private and the Golden Dubloon"  
>Author: Pirate Turner<br>Dedicated To: My beloved Jack, my wonderful and inspirational Muse, who requested this story  
>Rating: PG<br>Summary: Trouble ensues when Private finds a dubloon.  
>Warnings: Slash, Established Pairings<br>Word Count: 4,536  
>Dates Written: 22-28 August, 2011<br>Disclaimer: Rico, Kowalski, Skipper, Private, all other recognizable characters mentioned within, and the Penguins of Madagascar are & TM DreamWorks and any other rightful owners, none of whom are the author; are used without permission; and may not be used without permission. The snake and everything else is & TM the author. The author makes absolutely no profit off of this work of fan fiction, and no copyright infringement is intended.

**Chapter One**

He smiled, his forked tongue slithering joyously between his fangs, as his treasure gleamed in the golden, afternoon sunlight. He tossed the coin up and struck his head lightly against it. It bounced from his head down his scales, and each time it touched his skin, he bounced it again until it reached his rattlers. His rattlers tossed it back to his head, and he caught it firmly in his fangs.

He was proud of his treasure. At first glance, it would look to others to just be a shiny coin, but he knew what it really was. It was another Spanish dubloon to add to his collection which he had been working on since he'd found his first piece as a baby snake. He had had many adventures while collecting his dubloons, but yet still they were so hard and rare to come by that, even after he added this dubloon to his collection, he'd still need a couple more before his treasure chest was complete.

He threw his dubloon up into the air and admired the way it shimmered in the sun during its spiral. His eyes bobbed up and down with it as it turned round and round, but then, suddenly, before he could catch it again, screams split the air. He winced, coiling against himself as bratty children's voices filled the air.

The crowd came charging around the corner of the zoo, and he barely had time to zip into the gutter before they would have been upon him. He coiled into a tiny ball in the dark, dank gutter and gazed out at the rushing school children as they trampled over the zoo grounds and everything they held.

He gasped as he saw his dubloon laying on the pavement, in the unprotected open. His tail whipped out from hiding, reaching for his treasure only to be ran over. He screamed as the school children trampled over his tail and swept his aching tail back to him. He rubbed his head against his throbbing tail and looked forlornly back out at his treasure.

He could go after it, he thought, but then, even if the brats didn't trample his whole body as they had his tail, they'd start screaming. He knew all too well what screams meant. If the kids started screaming because of him, he'd be locked up again before he even had a chance to defend himself.

Humans hated snakes, and most of the world's animals weren't much better. He'd learned that the hard way when he'd been separated from his mother at an early age. The only thing he'd managed to keep from his time with her had been the dubloon he'd found one day while they'd been out sunning in the grass. He'd made promises the entire time he'd been caged that he would one day find his mother, but over the years, as he'd grown older, he'd realized what an impossible task that was and had shifted his attention instead to building his treasure.

Now he saw his gold piece being trampled on by tiny feet. He hissed in disdain and anger, his eyes turning red with his fury, but still he stayed hidden. He didn't dare go against the humans for he'd lose every time. They were too powerful, too angry, and too ready to do whatever it took to destroy his kind. They tolerated snakes once they were caged, but to them, the only really good snake was a dead snake.

He hissed and recoiled back into the murky shadows, trying his best not to taste the disgusting air, as more pudgy, human feet stopped before his hiding place. Their loud voices boomed inside his head until, at last, they began to drift off. Still he stayed hidden, too scared to move lest they simply be quiet for a rare change and outside of his narrow view from the gutter. The sun sparkled on his dubloon, and he finally began to move toward it when two pairs of talons appeared before his vision.

He hissed fiercely. Birds ate snakes and were almost as cruel as the humans! He recoiled back into the depths of his hiding place before they could see him and listened to their conversation, his rattlers shaking with his impatience as he waited for them to move so that he could rescue his cherished dubloon.

There were two voices, both male. One was younger than the other and almost a bit squeaky. The older of the two spoke nonsense, or at least that's what it sounded like to the snake. He managed to piece together that the bigger bird was going out hunting for something he needed for some sort of scientific device he was building. The younger one hesitated, and the snake saw his uncertainty in the shifting of his talons across the pavement.

Private looked up at Kowalski through big eyes. "Do you think I could go with you?" he asked, twisting his flippers behind his back.

"Now, Private, why would you want to do that?" Private's face fell, and Kowalski blustered as he tried to make his response sound more compassionate. After all, it wasn't Private's fault that he didn't understand science and would be asking him a thousand questions about every piece he gathered for his new ray. "It's not that I wouldn't like to have you along on my excursion, but I'm sure you've more exciting things you'd like to do. Have you had a chance to read your latest Lunicorns magazine that came in today?"

"No." Private shook his head and slid his talon back across the ground. "It's just . . . I was kind of hoping that I might find something with the Lunicorns out there."

Kowalski laughed before he could stop himself and quickly silenced his bubbling laughter by placing a flipper over his mouth. "I'm sorry, Private," he told him sincerely. "It's just . . . Lunicorns are a far cry from scientific research."

Private sighed, his shoulders sagging, and dropped his face from Kowalski's eyes so that he'd not see how disappointed he was. "That's true," he admitted. "Magic is very different from science." He made a face. "Science is boring."

"Science is not boring!" Kowalski declared. "There's nothing more exciting than science! Science is what keeps us all alive! It makes everything in the world happen!"

Private's gaze dropped to his talons as Kowalski rattled on and on about the benefits of science. Something glittered underneath one of his talons, and as the on-looking snake winced in sight of the bird standing upon his dubloon, Private cocked his head to the side and examined the beautiful glitter. Kowalski continued to prattle on as Private picked up the dubloon.

'The snake hissed and almost charged out of his hiding place. He thought better of it at the last moment and coiled back up at the very entrance to the gutter. He could see the birds now and recognized them as penguins. Penguins were no fun to mess with, but they also were not as dangerous as the birds with which he usually fought. He'd watch them, wait for the little one to split apart from the big one, and then he'd take his dubloon back from him. His reddened eyes narrowed, and his rattlers shook. He'd get his dubloon back by whatever means necessary.

"That's okay, Kowalski," Private put in, interrupting the scientist's tirade at last, "I understand. Go ahead without me, and good luck finding what you need. I'm going to go watch my Lunicorns."

Kowalski stopped in surprise, his beak still open in mid-speech, but then he shut his beak and nodded. "Affirmative, but I'll make a deal with you, Private. Why don't we go searching for Lunicorn items tomorrow?"

"Okay." Private nodded and waved as Kowalski waddled off. Then he looked down at the beautiful, shining coin he clutched in his flipper and grinned. He'd never seen a coin like this. It would buy lots and lots of Lunicorn things, and he had a magazine waiting for him back at headquarters just full of Lunicorn items he'd love to have!

"Yay!" he cried to himself. Clutching his prize close to his chest, Private flipped back into the penguin exhibit and slipped swiftly to his bunker. He was in such a rush passing through the manhole cover that he didn't notice the snake slipping in behind him, nor did he hear him hiss as the cover shut behind him.

The snake hesitated for just a moment as his eyes adjusted to the lighting in the penguins' home. He heard no one moving about save the young one yet, and he raced after him, his red eyes glowing, his rattlers shaking, and his entire being intent upon only one task. He would get his dubloon back. It was his, and he would retrieve it, no matter what he had to do to the young penguin who clutched it greedily in his black flipper! He would have his dubloon!

**To Be Continued . . . **


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two**

Private slid speedily to his bunker, grabbed his magazine, and raced for the telly. He was almost there and had already started humming his favorite show's theme song when Skipper suddenly stepped into his pathway. "Hey, Private," Skipper asked, watching him through scrutinizing, beady eyes, "what's the rush?"

Private came to a halting stop so fast that the snake who was still following him in the shadows almost didn't stop in time. He snapped his thin body back and recoiled back into the dark shadows. Shutting his eyes, he faded into the darkness as the two penguins talked.

"Nothing really, Skipper," Private murmured, sliding a talon across the concrete floor. "I just thought I'd watch some telly, is all," he explained, hoping fervently that Skipper had not suddenly come up with another mission.

Skipper looked him up and down. There was something amiss with this picture, but he hadn't managed to put his flipper upon the truth of the situation yet. "Wouldn't you rather play a nice game of chess?" he questioned though he already knew the answer.

"Hum . . . Well, I, hum, that is . . . " Private nervously scratched the back of his head.

A sly grin tugged at the corners of Skipper's beak. "Is it Lunicorn time already?"

"Yes!" Private cried, clutching his magazine in front of him. His eager grin beamed across his entire face, and his eyes shone with his delight. "Yes, it is!" When Skipper nodded, Private asked hopefully, "Do you want to watch it with me? We could play chess afterward."

Skipper made a face before he could stop himself, and Private's smile dimmed in the light of his open and truthful reaction. The fact that he would never waste his time with such a boring and childish cartoon was on the very tip of his Skipper's tongue, but he swallowed his distaste for the kid's show at the look on his beloved Private's face. "I don't have time for it today," he opted to say instead. "I've got work to do. We'll be facing an important mission tomorrow, and I've got to get our plans ready."

"Really?" Private asked.

Skipper nodded with an important air even as he tried to figure out which mission he would send his team on. He hadn't planned anything of true importance for a few days yet, but he'd simply bump up the mission. Perhaps it was time to travel outside of the zoo again. He'd look at his plans and see what master scheme he could concoct quickly for them.

"Do you need me?" Private asked quietly, his eager, bright smile having been replaced by a frown and his eyes beginning to water. He clutched his magazine more tightly.

Skipper smiled compassionately upon his young lover. "Not for this, not yet, young Private, but I'll call you when I do. Go enjoy your show. If you can take such great pleasure out of something so whimsical and innocent, go for it."

Private was gone before Skipper could even finish his statement. He was left alone in the corridor, and yet he did not feel alone. The commando penguin's skillful eyes swept the area. He had the strongest sensation that he was being watched; his feathers shivered along his body. Something was wrong. Some one was watching them.

Somebody was after them, but then when was there not some dastardly villain out there aiming for him and his men? There was always some evil plot afoot that they would have to stop. Skipper didn't know what this latest scheme was yet, but he would soon. As soon as he recognized it, he'd call his men to him, and he and his team would stop the foul villain in their tracks.

For now, he just had to wait, watch, listen, and study the situation. He hated waiting, but there wasn't much else that could be done yet, not until he discovered the latest plot to throw over the world. Clasping his flippers behind his back, Skipper waddled on to his scheming board.

The snake opened his eyes and watched the penguin leaving. He was the leader, while the one who clutched his dubloon in his greedy flippers was the young one of this flock. His forked tongue slithered out of his mouth. He'd have to be careful. He had to get his dubloon back, but he didn't want to end up having to fight all of them in these closed quarters that were their turf. If he could get them on an even playing field, he wouldn't mind, but they had the advantage.

Of course, they weren't the only ones with an advantage. He, too, had an advantage for he was in their home and the penguins had no idea of his presence. He smiled and laughed. His laughter made a hissing sound, and he stopped, recoiled back into the shadows, and snapped his eyes shut.

He moved back into hiding just a split second before Skipper turned around. His steely eyes searched the area again. "Hmm," he muttered aloud, rubbing a flipper across his feathered chin. He could have sworn he'd heard something, and yet he saw nothing. He shrugged his shoulders, turned around, and took a few more steps before suddenly whirling around again. Yet he still saw nothing. He shrugged a second time and left the corridor.

Maybe his men were right. Maybe he was getting just a little paranoid with his age. Nonsense! he thought, fervently shaking his head. He wasn't paranoid; he was just well guarded!

Behind the leader's back, the snake again slipped out of the shadows. His forked tongue slithered out of his mouth, and he tasted the stale air in the penguins' lair. He used his senses to locate the young thief who had taken his dubloon and slipped quickly after him, keeping to the shadows and continuing to blend in perfectly.

He found the young one sitting before a loudly blaring television set. He'd seen the instruments before though he did not understand the fascination they appeared to hold for the rest of the world. The penguin danced in his seat in time to the music that grated on the snake's nerves and made his scales cringe. He shut his ear slits against the racket and peeped at the screen. Animals were running about it. They looked like unicorns, but though unicorns were a legend in their own right, these things were the silliest beings he'd ever seen.

The snake turned from the television set in disgust and looked back to the young penguin watching it. He was completely absorbed in the show, but as a commercial came on, he turned back to flipping through his magazine. The snake smiled and slithered his tongue in anticipation as he spotted the golden glimmer he'd come to love so much over his years shining in the penguin's flipper. He slid smoothly across the floor and climbed up the back of Private's chair. He draped his coils around the top of the chair and leaned forward. Silently, he opened his fangs, and then, as Private oohed and awed over his Lunicorns magazine, the snake made his move and struck for Private!

**To Be Continued . . . **


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three**

Private shot forward, shoving his magazine to the side of his chair, as his beloved Lunicorns returned to the telly. He had no idea that he had moved just in time to send the rattlesnake that had been lurching for his throat barreling over the side of his chair. The snake landed on his head with a painful wince, and his fangs clashed down onto his own poor tongue. He shut his mouth tightly to keep from moaning with the pain shooting through his body and pulled his coils around him.

He heard some one come into the room and slipped swiftly underneath the young penguin's chair. This one, too, was a penguin, but the snake watched the red sticks he was playing with through widened eyes. He saw the penguin glance at the television set, shrug his ebony shoulders, and return his attention to the sticks he held. The snake's mouth dropped wide open as the penguin swallowed the dynamite and then smiled and licked his beak. "Boom," he murmured, leaving the room with the snake's mouth still agape and his eyes nearly bugging out of his head.

It took the snake several minutes to recover from his shock, and what pulled him back to his senses was the glittering gleam of his dubloon. The things on the television set were now singing, and the penguin who'd stolen his dubloon sang along with them while joyously tossing his dubloon between his flippers. He watched as it sparkled and crooned over its beauty. "Ooh, you're beautiful, but I'm gonna buy a new, talking, and glow in the dark Lunicorn dolly with you! She'll be even prettier!"

The snake's tail rattled. Nothing was prettier than a dubloon! The stupid bird who'd stolen his dubloon didn't even recognize the treasure he held, and to call those Lunicorns creatures prancing across his screen better than dubloons was just pure insanity talk! Anger boiled within him. Not only had the penguin stolen his hard earned dubloon, but he planned to waste it on a cursed doll! Hissing madly, he jumped into the air, performed a somersault mid-leap to reverse his direction, and headed straight for Private's unsuspecting neck.

Private was so lost in his cartoon that he had no idea he was in danger until he heard Skipper's commanding voice boom, "GET DOWN, PRIVATE!" He immediately did as he was instructed, throwing himself out of his chair and onto the concrete floor. Then he watched through widened eyes as Skipper barreled over him, a snake caught in his beak. He squeaked, trembled, and backed as far as he could against the legs of his chair.

Private watched in horror as Skipper fought the snake that had entered their home. Skipper shook the snake until he managed to sink his deadly fangs into his feathers. Then he released him with a yelp but immediately fell back into a fighting stance. The snake struck again and again, but each time Skipper managed to block him from biting him again. The commando penguin swung his balled flippers and kicking talons at the snake, but it eluded his every strike.

At long last, Skipper plunged pass the snake's defenses and shot both of his flippers into the bottom of his jaw. The snake was thrown up into the air by the impact, but he recovered quickly, did a few flips, and came down behind Skipper. His tail was already wrapping around Skipper's body as he landed, and though Skipper tried his best to remove the coils tightening around him, they wouldn't budge. The snake wrapped more tightly around him and began to squeeze him as he turned his eyes, reddened once more with the fury boiling in his blood, onto Private's shocked and scared face.

Private blinked at him from between the flippers that covered his beady, little eyes. The snake's dubloon glimmered inside his left flipper, and the snake hissed and squeezed Skipper more tightly. "You took what isss mine," he hissed. "Now I'll take what isss yoursss!"

"I . . . I . . . " Private stammered.

"Private, stand down, man! Run! Go get the others! That's an order!"

Private continued to stare at the snake despite Skipper's despairing commands, and then realization hit him. He opened his flippers and showed the snake the dubloon. "This is yours, isn't it?" he asked and knew he was right from the way the snake smiled and the dubloon's reflection sparkled in his blood red eyes. He squeezed Skipper even harder as Private tried to reason, "I didn't mean to take it! I just found it! I didn't know it belonged to some one!"

"You knew!" the snake accused. He made the last few tightenings around his prey and ignored Skipper's flippers beating at his coils. His rattles shook. "You knew it belonged to sssome one, and you took it any way! Dubloons don't just ssshow up on the ground out of nowhere!"

"It's a dubloon?" Private asked in surprise, cocking his head to one side as he examined the coin. He shrugged. "I thought it was just a pretty coin. I'm sorry," he said earnestly. "I really didn't mean to take it. All you had to do was ask, and I would have given it back to you."

"Really?" the snake questioned as his scales draped over Skipper's eyes.

"Private!" Skipper cried, his beak now the only part of him left uncovered by the snake's ferocious body.

"Yes." Private held out the coin to the snake. "I'm not a thief. Let Skipper go, and you can have it."

The snake hissed as he examined the offered coin through slitted eyes. The offer was too good to be true. No one had ever offered to give back anything that they had taken from him before. The penguin had to be lying! It was some sort of trap. He jerked back and squeezed Skipper what would have been one last time if a huge, golden ball had not suddenly rolled into the room with them.

**To Be Concluded . . . **


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter Four**

The snake and Private watched as the golden ball spun between them, and then it fell, revealing its true identity. The snake's eyes shot wide while Private curled his head back and looked warily at the object. It wasn't a ball at all, but the biggest dubloon the snake had ever seen! With but barely a thought, the snake released Skipper, flipped through the air, landed on the dubloon, and hugged it tightly. "Mine!" he cried, his forked tongue slithering out of his mouth. "Mine! Mine! Mine!"

An urgent squawk shouted from the doorway. "DOWN!"

Though he was not yet recovered and still quite groggy from the snake's attack, Skipper heard Rico's voice and understood immediately. He flipped through the air, grabbed Private, and landed with him beneath him on the other side of the room just as the dubloon exploded. The dynamite attached to the under side of the dubloon Rico had vomited shot both the dubloon and the snake through their ceiling and up to the sun. Unfortunately, it also took out that side of the penguins' living room, and Private cried as the Lunicorns' voices were shattered in the middle of their friendship song.

"The telly!" he wailed. "It's gone!"

Rico snorted as he came forward, dusting off his flippers. "Better telly," he squawked, "than Skipper!"

"True, true!" Private was quick to agree. He looked up toward the hole in their roof. "He won't be coming back, will he?"

"No, soldier," Skipper announced, getting off of Private and offering him a flipper to pull him up beside him, "that is one gone snake."

Rico laughed and beamed proudly. "Kaboom!"

Skipper nodded and slapped his shoulder. "Well done, soldier!"

"Kaboom! Kaboom!"

"Here," Private said and handed his dubloon over to Skipper. "I honestly didn't mean to take it," he admitted, "but if he won't be coming back, we might as well use it to repair the damages and buy a new telly."

Rico paused and looked hopefully at Skipper. "Bigger?" he squawked.

Skipper nodded thoughtfully as he ran a flipper over his jaw. "I see no reason why we can't have a bigger set," he acknowledged. Then he stepped forward and took Private in his arms. "And, Private, we all know you didn't intend to steal that dubloon."

"You do?" Private asked, looking with hopeful innocence shining in his face and eyes up at his beloved commander.

"We do," Skipper affirmed. "You're the sweetest, kindest soul I've ever met, and you'd never do anything intentional to harm any one unless the mission called for it." He smiled down at him. "But I think you've earned your new Lunicorn dolly." He tried not to make a face as he spoke the last two words. The Lunicorns were disgusting to him, but he knew his Private loved them almost as much as he loved him. "Rico," he asked, holding out a flipper, "if you will?"

On command, Rico spit out a few dollar bills into Skipper's awaiting flippers. "Go," Skipper told Private, pressing the bills into his flipper. "Go buy your Lunicorn."

Tears were already beginning to well into Private's eyes as Skipper gave him the money. He hugged him tightly and then raced away before his love could change his mind.

Rico, meanwhile, was examining the effects of his handiwork. "Kaboom! Kaboom!" he called joyously.

Kowalski stepped into the living room, having just returned with his findings from the afternoon. "Gazooks!" he exclaimed, slapping a flipper against his forehead as he gawked at the new hole in their ceiling. "What happened here?"

Skipper smiled. "Life happened, soldier."

Kowalski's gaze darted from his strangely smiling Skipper to Rico. Rico's wild eyes met his, and he cried with ecstatic happiness. "Kaboom! Kaboom! Kaboom!" He loved it when a plan came together, and for it to be his plan that had saved the day made the dangerous penguin even happier.

Kowalski sighed his acceptance as he supposed that, in their lives, coming home to a huge hole in the ceiling was truly nothing new. It had happened because of some fight, and there was scarcely a day that went by that they were not caught up in some battle or another. He had been passed by Private rushing off and yelling excitedly about buying a new Lunicorn dolly, and though he'd known then that something was up, Kowalski knew that it was Rico who had really been instrumental in this fight. As he walked over to join Rico and praise his own love for winning the day as he could tell from Rico's excitement that he had, Kowalski thought to himself that Skipper was right as usual. It was all in the normal happenings of a penguin's day for them, and he was just glad his team, his family, were okay.

* * *

><p>Miles away, Private clutched his new Lunicorn dolly and grinned in the setting sun with his happiness. He bounced all the way home, singing and dancing the Lunicorn friendship song and completely, blissfully unaware of the snake that was already beginning to slither back to the zoo.<p>

**The End**


End file.
